Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize