Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
