we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
