dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
