It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize