Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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