have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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