He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
