just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
