Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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