and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
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