Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I wish i was in the wii world.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
My vagina is very pro this idea
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