CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You're like the curious george of whores
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Randomize
