Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
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And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
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do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
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