That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
