You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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