in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize
