What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
