yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
