omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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