just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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