Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
this hospital has no fireball
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
