Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I could fuck to npr.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
