i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Randomize
