She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
he laminated a picture of his dick.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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