If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
