That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
