Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
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we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my cat just said my name.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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