whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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