So drunk its hurt
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
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On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
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i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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