"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
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