when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Everything about him screamed your future.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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