i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize