Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize