why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
