Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Vodka?
Forever.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
