think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize