remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Randomize
