4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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