During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
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our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
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Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
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