Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize