Can Purell be used as lube?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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