wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
