i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
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