Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just pynch a tree in the face
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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