so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
