Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize