Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
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