Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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