I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
It's rum buckets o'clock
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Randomize
