I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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