He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
