dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
